When I was 12, I became bulimic. My prayer was always the same.
“Lord, if I’m still dealing with this when I’m 16, I promise I’ll tell someone.”
Then, I turned 16 and I was just a smidge over 100lbs. Everyone was worried, but instead of confessing when they questioned me, I lied. I smoothed it all over.
That’s what we do when we have something plaguing us — something that is stealing the very life out of us — we smooth it over. We go to church in our Sunday best and say “I’m okay” when people ask us how we are doing.
We shut the door and cover up our sobs with the sounds of the shower running. Our tears mingle with the water. No one can see us.
But I want you to hear this, especially if that is you today: God sees. But not in a judgy-mac-judgerson type of way. He sees in an “Aww…I want to set her free” kind of way.
Hear me: GOD WANTS YOU FREE.
How to Stop Sinning
While we will never be sin-free on this side of Heaven, this one tip will help you shake off a repetitive sin. It’s super hard and super easy: confess.
When I became a Christian, I was still bulimic. I would go home after jumping around singing, “Jesus You are My Best Friend” and listening to a soul-changing sermon — and barf.
I raged at God. Said some four-letter expletives with my fists in the air.
“WHY HAVEN’T YOU DELIVERED ME!!! DON’T YOU LOVE ME??”
Then, I read this verse in the Bible:
Confess your trespasses to one another, and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The effective, fervent prayer of a righteous man avails much. James 5:16
So, I did.
I confessed to EVERY SINGLE PERSON I KNEW. I didn’t care anymore about my embarrassment. I was so steadfast in my desire to BE HEALED that I told anyone who would hear me.
Now, hear this: I did NOT get healed instantly.
Through my confession (and the prayers of those I told), the pieces began to be put in place for me to get into an outpatient facility.
If you have read my testimony, you know that the moment I walked through the doors to sign up for this treatment, I never threw up again. I believe God didn’t heal me upon the first confession because he knew that I need long-term therapy to help me understand WHY I was bulimic. This knowledge has deepened that healing process.
Bulimia is a symptom of a bigger issue. As soon as I was set up to figure out the depths of my problem through therapy, he set me free of the symptom.
My constant confession played a vital role in getting the help I needed.
If you are struggling with something today, confess it. Ask those to whom you are confessing it to for prayer. And wait.
God will set you free. Be on the lookout for his hand. Expect it. The Bible says that he doesn’t withhold gifts from those who walk uprightly. (Psalms 84:11)
*Unlike my story, you might want to confess it to “safe” people unless you don’t care about judgement and condemnation. Also, beware of “advice” from well-meaning people. What you need is a movement of GOD through his HOLY SPIRIT. Ask for prayer not advice.
Head covering Christian woman who loves good wine, coffee, stinky cheese and missionary books. My favorite dessert is Peanut Butter Chocolate Cheesecake. I am a Christian author, blogger, and speaker. I fell in love with my husband because he had rain drops on his glasses (true story). In my spare time I homeschool my six children (5 girls, 2 boys).